Remember the first day of school when you were growing up? Were the confident kids the ones looking down at their shoes, mumbling, and standing shrugging their shoulders? No, they were the ones who were smiling at you, inviting you to sit with them at lunch, and walking around the halls with a purpose. Think about how this plays out in adulthood. Do you walk around like the shy kid who gets pushed around in a crowded cafeteria, or the self-assured, student who has no problem raising her hand in class and making new friends?
When you’re feeling insecure, nervous, or lacking confidence and self-esteem in a situation, your body language reflects it. Many of us were that talkative, friendly child during our formative years, but through life experiences and situations that may have bruised our egos; we have succumbed to lacking self-esteem and thus may appear insecure. It’s never too late to give that little kid in all of us a self-esteem boost and it can be as simple as changing your body language. Self-esteem boosters are a good way to begin your journey to building or improving your confidence.
Self-Esteem Boosters to Try Today
Smile more. Most people I see who lack self-esteem show it on their face. They appear unhappy or uneasy. They frown or have a despondent look, making those around them uncomfortable. So my first self-esteem booster is to practice smiling on purpose, whether it’s for the mailman, coworker, or the barista at Starbucks. When you smile, others will mimic this. You will likely feel a bit happier and people will perceive you as being so.
Stand Up Straight. Mom was right: good posture is important. Those who slouch or hunch, literally, appear like they are waiting for someone to push them down; as if they don’t have enough respect for themselves to stand up straight. Do yourself a favor and stand with a purpose; shoulders back, head up and back as straight as you can.
Eye Contact. When you make eye contact with the person you are speaking to, you are automatically showing them respect. Looking down or deliberately avoiding their eyes gives off an insecure vibe. Practice making and maintaining eye contact for one breath, or a few seconds, with everyone. This self-esteem booster may be uncomfortable at first, but shows others that you respect yourself enough, and have the self-esteem, to be seen and listened to.
Try these simple strategies to increase the way you want others to perceive you and you may begin feeling more secure within yourself.
View Emily’s post on Healthyplace.com
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Emily Roberts MA, LPC is The Guidance Girl. Her goal is to help YOU become the most confident person you know! Emily is an award-winning author Express Yourself: A Teen Girls Guide to Speaking Up and Becoming Who You Are, Psychotherapist, TV & Media Contributor, Educational Speaker, and parenting consultant. She travels around the country educating girls, women, and parents. Express Yourself is available at bookstores nationwide and on Amazon. To learn more about Emily click here.
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Great tips Emily, thank you.
One I would like to add is about voice. Literally speak from your heart. Imagine that your voice is coming out of your chest. This will naturally create a better posture as well, as your tip #2. You may also find yourself smiling 🙂
All the best
Keir
These are great additions! It also reminds me to speak from our authentic selves- nice! Thank you for the reminder 🙂 Drop me a line anytime about other ideas!
Take Good Care,
Emily
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Take Good Care,
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