Bad days suck but they don’t have ruin your entire day or week. When we purposely acknowledge the negative and make a choice to do something to create more positive energy we can keep bad moments from becoming bad days. Whether it’s one thing that just makes you feel angry or annoyed, or events that keep bring you down, bad days are real but you don’t have to let it take over your life. Sure, these moments can be challenging and instead of thinking about your day as a total waste, entirely awful or out of your control, I want to give you my tips on how I feel happier fast.
Turn a Bad Day Into a Better Day
- Avoid Avoiding. IN DBT we talk about Building Mastery. That means doing small things to help you feel more in control and confident in your life. The problem with avoiding is things pile up and so do the feelings of insecurity or inadequacy—amplifying a bad mood or bad day. Instead, clean up one area of your mess. Could it be emailing that person you’ve been avoiding, paying the bill that’s due, or working on an assignment for 10-15 minutes? YES! That small feeling of accomplishment can help you get more motivated and thinking less about the bad day.
- Move locations. If you’re stuck in the office or school, it’s hard to shift locations, but you can walk around, go to a different workplace or make an effort to go somewhere peaceful and relaxing later in the day. If one location is perpetuating the bad day or bad mood—I get the heck out! I may go work from a coffee shop instead of my office. If you can’t change locations right away just remind yourself you can go somewhere later. This can help shift your focus from the crappy to the happy.
- Say No. Don’t say yes when you want to say no to someones request or demands. You’re letting yourself get more moody if you give into something that doesn’t feel good. Especially if you’re in a bad mood or having a bad day, saying no is okay. BUT if it’s something that could potentially brighten your day, like a coffee date with a friend or a event maybe say yes. If its causing you more stress, NO is the best answer for everyone involved—you don’t want them to be in a bad mood too!
- Get grateful. Write a list of things that you’re grateful for in the moment. Studies show it gets you into a more positive mindset. Try writing a thank-you note, or call someone to say thanks People who are mindful of the positives in their life, create more positive energy. Comment on a post you like, email a friend, or even write down what you are grateful for in the moment (try and think of 5 new ones each time).
- Don’t get sucked into social media. Scrolling aimlessly through your Facebook feed or Instagram will totally kill your confidence and make your bad mood worse. It’s likely that you’ll be focusing on the bad and not the good—making your more vulnerable to feeling icky. If you have the urge to get on social media, look for posts and people who inspire you, who are happy, who give you guidance (mine The Guidance Girl may do the trick!). Also set a timer don’t do it all day long!
- Get motivated. A TED talk or Podcast can make a bad day seem like a dream. Here are a few that have helped me move my thoughts and feelings from blah to blissful in less than 20 minutes.
- Wellness Wonderland by Katie Dalebout: @katiedalebout The Wellness Wonderland is a collection of inspiration and thoughts from the wonderful Katie Dalebout. Katie aims to inspire by sharing what catches her eye in order open other’s eyes to hw wonderful the world can be and become more loving and happier on he inside and out. Launched in November 2011, Wonderland seeks to inspire holistic health, lifestyle, and design through yoga, spirituality and wellness.
- The Love Pioneer by Jennifer Kass: @Jennifer_Kass
Jennifer Kass’s Love Pioneer seeks to help busy people learn how to be spiritual and loving. Jennifer’s mission is to make love a global force, teaching willing hearts and minds. After working as an editor for Conde Nast, Kass went back to her roots from growing up with Buddhist American parents, and decided to help others learn how to love themselves.
- Radical Self Love: Gala Darling TedxCMU: @GalaDarling
In this Ted Talk, Gala Darling talks to women about not feeling beautiful or loving themselves. Our low self-esteem and our own fears are what are holding us back. Gala notes that if you cannot love yourself, you cannot love others. For more information on how to be happy in yourself, visit GalaDarling.com on Radical Self-love; it’s all within us. Make sure to read and recite the Radical Self-Love manifesto.
- How to be a Miracle Worker: Gabrielle Bernstein. TedxFiDiWomen: @GabbyBernstein
Bernstein talks about her life being spiritually dead by 25 and her finding a miracle. Through sobriety and learning to perceive life with love as well as finding a course in miracles, she changed her life from one of wanting things to be happy to one of finding happiness in love and forgiveness. Bernstein urges to find your truth and unlearn your ego. To stop comparing and start forgiving.
- The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion: Kristin Neff. TedxCentennialParkWomen: @Self-Compassion
In this Ted Talk, Kristen Neff argues for self-compassion. Neff discusses having to be above average in American society to have self-esteem and the epidemic of narcissism. Neff notes that self-compassion should not be contingent on success or attractiveness in the case of women. Neff asks to feel empathy for and embracing yourself; to treat yourself like a good friend. Mindfulness. For more information, visit Neff’s website Self-Compassion.org.
So try these out when you’re having a bad day or are stuck in a bad mood. See what you can do to interrupt a bad day and begin attracting more positive energy feels like.
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Emily Roberts MA, LPC is The Guidance Girl. Her goal is to help YOU become the most confident person you know! Emily is an award-winning author Express Yourself: A Teen Girls Guide to Speaking Up and Becoming Who You Are, Psychotherapist, TV & Media Contributor, Educational Speaker, and parenting consultant. She travels around the country educating girls, women, and parents. Express Yourself is available at bookstores nationwide and on Amazon. To learn more about Emily click here.